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Getting men to buy in to seeking help

For men to be open to accepting professional help when it comes to mental health it requires a shift in mindset.

“Unfortunately men often suffer in solitude,” say Marcus Cheung with the Calgary Counselling Centre.

The manager of counselling initiatives adds men tend to isolate and not talk about what’s really on their minds.

“If you’re family, friend or supportive person, what you really want to do is just create that space to let men know, ‘thanks for coming forward, thanks for talking to me about your difficulties.’ It’s a lot of validation and letting them know there is a place for them to be vulnerable, and its okay to be vulnerable as men.”

Cheung sees men as less likely to access support when compared to women, and it’s not just for mental health services, but also just seeing a doctor and overall asking for help.

“We know traditionally this is an area that men often struggle with.”

Cheung says when men come to the counselling groom, what comes out is the stigma around mental help and that men are not supposed to ask for help.

Men come to counselling facing depression, anxiety, lack of motivation, “not feeling like themselves,” concerns about the economy and hopelessness about the future and how much they are able to change in their lives.

“Men are having a difficult time tolerating the “not knowing” or ambiguity and uncertainty about the future,” says Cheung.

Another big issue affecting men is their relationship with their partner.

“For men in relationships, they are reporting difficulty having a healthy relationship with their partner. Sometimes its communication, or other relationship concerns like trust, jealousy, and infidelity.”

Cheung says men have a very solution focused mindset and they aim to get it done right away. “There is not a lot about ‘I might want to talk it out with somebody’ and there is a lot of misunderstanding about how talking it out with somebody might help.”

As a society, Cheung sees the need to shift our mindset to admit that men struggle, suffer and need help.

“I think creating space for men to share some of those struggles so that when they do reach out we have to be prompt on our responses.”

Resources are available online or in person via Counselling Alberta and the Calgary Counselling Centre.

In Lloydminster a full list of supports are also available online and in-person.

Gerry Lampow
Gerry Lampow
Gerry has lived in Lloydminster since winter 2010. That detail is important as coming from the Caribbean he did not see green grass until May. Now an Alberta/Western Canada resident, you would be hard-pressed to find a stronger proponent of Lloydminster than the news guy that appreciates a healthy dose of rock music and dress code leather. His mantra is focus on one thing and do it well.
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